This is from weather.com. I am going to bold the things I find either

a) disturbing

b) frightening

c) just plain dramatic

my initial reactions are in gray and italics. Enjoy.

...WINDY AND BITTERLY COLD WIND CHILLS TONIGHT AND EARLY TUESDAY MORNING...

ARCTIC AIR WILL CONTINUE TO INVADE SOUTHERN NEW ENGLAND TONIGHT. (invade? what in the world. it is like an army? an evil cold army planning our DOOM?! TERRORISTS.) VERY COLD TEMPERATURES ARE EXPECTED TONIGHT WITH READINGS FALLING INTO THE SINGLE DIGITS (O RLY?) ACROSS MOST OF THE REGION. THE EXCEPTIONS WILL BE TEMPERATURES NEAR ZERO (thank goodness some fortunate souls will be able to feel the warmth of a nice near zero day...)WELL INLAND AND

IN THE LOW TEENS ACROSS CAPE COD AND THE ISLANDS. THESE FRIGID TEMPERATURES WILL BE ACCOMPANIED BY STRONG WEST WINDS. THE COMBINATION OF VERY COLD TEMPERATURES AND STRONG WINDS WILL YIELD WIND CHILL VALUES OF ZERO TO MINUS 10 ACROSS SOUTHERN NEW ENGLAND. (AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!)

THESE BITTERLY COLD WIND CHILLS WILL MAKE FOR DANGEROUS CONDITIONS FOR ANYONE OUTDOORS. (I shall not leave the indoors ever again. weather.com has spoken)EXPOSURE TO COLD CAN CAUSE LIFE THREATENING HEALTH CONDITIONS. (OH NOES!) AVOID SERIOUS CONDITIONS SUCH AS FROSTBITE AND HYPOTHERMIA BY KEEPING WARM. MAKE SURE TO WEAR A HAT...HOOD OR SCARF ( HOOD?! but the Bostonians might think I am a terrorist or a bomb looking device)

...AS MOST HEAT IS LOST THROUGH THE HEAD. (that just sounds wrong entirely.) ALSO...WEAR LAYERED CLOTHING (thank you, weather.com, I will be wearing ALL of my clothing)...AS LAYERS PROVIDE BETTER INSULATION AND WARMTH. IF YOU OR A PERSON YOU SUSPECT IS SUFFERING FROM FROSTBITE OR HYPOTHERMIA...SEEK MEDICAL HELP IMMEDIATELY OR CALL 911. (don't piss me off or I will call them and tell them you have frostbite AND that you are a terrorist; you dont want to mess with me cause 10 dollars says they arrest you.)

I love the winter. Just like George Bush loves the google.